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Am I too fussy or he’s just not the one for me ?
By Ms Chor Lor | July 9, 2009 | 145 views
Through all these years, I actually had lost 2 men in my life who could have been mine.
The first one was someone I knew from Changi. We were both so young then, probably about early 20s. I remembered he will always cycle to Changi with a group of his friends and chatted with us. And I will always disturb him and hiao with him.
Then we got closer. He will always come and find me. We sort of like become BF and GF. He will come meet me at my house and then we will take a bus and go Changi together. And hang out there till morning.
I think it was the day when he was at my house, he wanted it and I rejected it. And from then on, he seldom come and find me anymore. After which I also did not go Changi anymore. It was only years later, that I met one of my sista, and she told me she is married. As in real married at ROM, husband and wife. She then told me I also knew her husband one.
And when I saw it was him, I was a little shocked. And I was thinking to myself, his wife could have been me………………if we had got along well all the way……………But I never hated them or anything. I will also give her my blessings that they can be together. Maybe he is just never my fate at all.
Then some years ago, maybe 5 or 6, I knew this guy from IRC. He actually liked me. Dated me out a few times. But I just don’t have that chemistry or feel with him. And I find him too quiet and shy a person to be with. He is always so shy and quiet, it’s so hard to make him talk sometimes. Then he will always just sit there looking at me, and when ask him, he will just say, admiring him………………
Eventually we lost contact. Some times later, I got to know he was with another sista now. And has been together for quite a while.
And just today, I met them again. They had been living together happily for probably about 3 or 4 years. And they really seemed like husband and wife together now. I also feel happy for them but at the same time felt sour inside. Again, this potential husband could have been my husband………………. I’m sure the two of them will get married someday.
Again, maybe he’s just not my fate as well………………….
And over the years, I have witnessed many happily ever after couples as well. There were 2 or 3 sistas who found ang moh and had emigrated to their country and had been happily married for so many years.
But in Singapore though, there are just probably less than 5 couples that I know of that have been happily together for many years.
Out of the thousands of us transgenders in the whole Singapore community, it is probably just less than 20? or even 10? not very sure, that have found love.
Love is forever a fantasy, a far hard to reach dream for us……………..
Topics: Transgender | 3 Comments »
July 9th, 2009 at 5:45 pm
I’m sure you’ll find yours some day. He’ll be out there waiting for you,so don’t give up hope
Jiayou!
July 9th, 2009 at 7:24 pm
Fussy or no feeling??
didnt work out cuz of no feeling or cuz some factors u dun like about the men?
Anyway this kind of thing cannot forced de.. what will be your will be..
Good things always come last.. so i believe its worth the wait
July 9th, 2009 at 9:54 pm
GAMBATE!!!!!!!!! ;p